Short Final

Oh, the years gone by… Many years ago when I was a student pilot flying a C-120, (if you can remember when flight schools used C-120s, you may be older than I am), I groundlooped in front of the tower at BFI. Here’s the exchange, as I remember it: Tower: Cessna triple 7, are you […]

We were out taking pictures for a safety seminar, and admittedly a bit distracted (no, the irony is not lost on us) when we reported a left base to the tower. That’s when things got silly… Us: Tower, we’re high, uh, Cessna 1234, on the left base. Tower: Sir, you’re speaking with ATC, and I’m […]

Proudlyflyingmy new Lancair Columbia 350intoTucson International, having been cleared for the visual to 11L, I heard this interchange with a regional jet: Tower:RJ1234 you’re cleared for the visual following the Columbia on a one mile final. (pause) RJ1234: …I’m following the Space Shuttle?!!

“Ive overheard this at the tower frequency at Amsterdam Schiphol Airport (EHAM) in The Netherlands…” Tower: KL123 you are cleared to land on runway 24 KL123: (with a loud background noise) Thank you sir, KL123 cleared to land runway 24 Tower: KL123, what is that high noise on the background? KL123: It’s just normal cockpit […]

Overheard while being vectored to the ILS 10 at KMSY the other day: Approach: Jet 123, maintain 9,000. Jet 123: Um, ok, we’re gonna go through it. Approach: That’s ok, climb and maintain 10,000. Jet 123: Uh, we’re on our way back down to 9,000, now. Approach: Well, 10 is available, you’re welcome to climb […]

Controllers on the ball… Heard while established on a seven-mile final to Runway 1 at Republic Airport in Farmingdale, NY (FRG) January 1, 2002… Arrow N1234: Republic Tower, Arrow 1234 nine miles north, landing with Victor. Tower: Arrow 234 report the right downwind Runway 1. Arrow 234: Tower, any chance we could get a straight […]

Sometimes you just gotta tell it like it is… While on short final for the center runway of KIWA during a busy time of day we overheard tower give instructions to the aircraft following behind us: N1234: Gateway tower, N1234, with you ILS three-zero-charlie. Tower: N1234, roger, number two cleared to land, there will be… […]

Overheard late last Friday night at my local non-towered airport… C-G1234: Unicom, request Airport Advisory. Unicom: Sorry, say again your sign? C-G1234: I’m a Gemini. I like candle-light dinners and long walks on the beach … but I don’t see what that has to do with anything, right now.

Everybody’s a comedian… Overheard this weekend. Pilot: Tower, Cessna1234 would like to shoot a missed approach. Tower: Cessna 1234 approved for missed approach. Pilot: Roger. How close can we come? Tower: … Just don’t hit the tower.

While doing some work, heard the following exchange on Kennedy Tower freq: Twr: Cactus 51, turn right zulu and golf, hold behind the plane that’s stopped to recycle. Cactus 51: Cactus 51 we’ll make the right zulu and golf, behind the recycled airplane … whatever that means. Trw: C’mon Cactus, you guys should know what […]