Short Final

This happened about 40 years ago. We had just had a snow storm at the airport I worked at, which was serviced by a commuter airline flying Twin Otters. It was near Christmas, and as the plane took the runway, the pilot announced over the unicom: “Air North flight XXX is dashing through the snow, […]

Heard at Orlando Executive: Tower:“Ercoupe 1234, we have a blimp landing to the right of runway 7. Reduce speed.” Ercoupe:“1234 reducing speed.” Tower:“1234, make a half-‘S’ turn to the left.” Ercoupe:“1234 making a half-assed turn to the left.” Robert C. Abbaticchiovia e-mail

Several years ago, while passing through Caracas air space, I heard this on the radio: Piper 1234:“Caracas Control, Piper 1234 inbound for full stop.” Caracas:“Piper 1234, turn right five degrees to intercept the ILS.” Piper 1234:“Caracas, five degrees is too little a turn for me.” Caracas:“Piper 1234, can you make a 90-degree turn?” Piper 1234:“Affirmative. […]

As an AIM AIR missionary pilot flying in South Sudan, listening in on Juba International Airport’s frequency can provide a few minutes of eye-watering laughs. It is a completely non-radar environment, and all position reports are by radial and DME. Everyone, from the British Airways flights transiting overhead to our small bush airplanes, all share […]

A friend of mine is a helicopter instructor in Arizona, and a student of his is approaching the cross-country flight portion of flight training. My instructor friend received this text from his student a few days ago: Hey, you’ve got me down for a cross-country to TBD. Where is it? I can’t find it anywhere! […]

Climbing out of Houston on a Sunday afternoon: Houston Center:“Citation 123, please see if you can contact Challenger ABCD on 128.17 and have them contact Houston Center.” [A few minutes pass.] Challenger ABCD:“Houston Center, this is Challenger ABCD checking in at flight level 360.” Houston Center:“Roger, Challenger ABCD. Descend to FL 240. What was the […]

In the late 1950s, our aero club was transitioning from Tiger Moths without radio to “cabin class” with the addition of a Tri-Pacer and a C-172A, where the flights were made without headsets using the overhead speaker. It came that an MK-5 Auster we had been restoring was due for test flying, and our chief […]

Overheard during a very, very rough ride out of Newark last week: Center:“Airliner 123, how is your ride?” Airliner 123:“The rides are crap.” [momentary pause] Airliner 123:“I’m sorry. That was unprofessional of me. The rides are unsatisfactory.” Center:“Your first description was acceptable.” Rob Nabieszkovia e-mail

Frederick Municipal Airport (FDK, elevation 303 feet) with a long-standing glider club on the field, recently began tower operations. After the tower had been operating for about one week, on a relatively busy Saturday afternoon I heard this exchange: Glider:“Frederick Tower, Glider XXX at 1,600 feet inbound for a right downwind for landing runway 12, […]

This was my experience, airborne near Hollister (CA) inbound to Salinas (CA) airport, SNS: Me:“Oakland Flight Watch, Aircoupe 1234, ten east of Hollister. Please give me current Salinas weather.” OAK:“Aircoupe 1234, Oakland Flight Watch. What’s the identifier?” Me:“Salinas identifier is SNS.” OAK:“I know what the identifier for Salinas is. I need the identifier for your […]