Short Final

Back in the early ’70s, I was an FO for now-defunct Cascade Airways in the Pacific Northwest. We were known to ATC as the VFR on-top airline. The following exchange was heard one day: ATC:“Ah, Cascade 123, Seattle Center; what do the clouds look like for you out there?” Cascade 123:“Well, let’s see — there’s […]

Back in the mid-’80s, Piedmont Airlines began flying out of Worcester airport (ORH) in Massachusetts to Baltimore/Washington International airport (BWI). A flight crew requested their IFR clearance, and I dutifully rattled it off to them in typical New England air traffic control fashion. As I concluded, the response I received in a thick Southern drawl […]

From “many years ago”: N12345:“Las Vegas Radio, this is N12345. Request airport advisory for landing Las Vegas. And would you please call Caesar’s Palace for transportation?” Las Vegas Radio:“N12345, Las Vegas Radio. Stand by for airport advisory – and I will call Caesar’s Palace if you want, but it will be 19 hours before they […]

A slight departure from our usual hijinks this week: The fallen Betty Ford was returning to Grand Rapids for the last time. Her remains were abord a beautiful United States Presidential airplane painted blue and white. The airport was closed to all other traffic for 30 minutes. Airliners waited patientally on the ground and some […]

Overheard on Denver Center: Denver Center (female voice) :“Jetlink 1234, Denver Center.” [A moment later.] Denver Center:“Jetlink 1234, Denver Center -“ Jetlink 1234 (male voice) :“Denver Center, Jetlink 1234 checking in at 240.” Denver Center:“Sorry. Guess I was just being impatient.” Jetlink 1234:“My wife does that to me, too.” Denver Center:“Well, then, it must be […]

Overheard on a busy Atlanta approach this evening. A Cessna was attempting to get VFR flight following and had been waiting several minutes to get a response from approach: Grumpy Cessna 12345:“Atlanta Approach, how long do you think it will be until I can get flight following? It’s been over 10 minutes now.” ATL Approach:“Cessna […]

Overheard on ground control frequency at LAX: Boeing 727 (to a newly introduced Short 330 commuter) :“Hey, that’s a nice looking aircraft.” Short 330 pilot:“Thanks.” Boeing 727:“When are you going to take it out of the box?” John K. Lewisvia e-mail

My sister-in-law and I were working together across the production bench a few years back as the local ATC scanner played in the background. The controller cleared an aircraft to take off, ending the transmission with, “Wind calm.” Instead, my sister-in-law heard, “… when calm.” She was quite alarmed that ATC would clear a pilot […]

Years ago, an air traffic controller at KSYR was working Approach Control and had numerous aircraft on his screen. Controller:“N1234, can you identify yourself? Are you a Cardinal?” N1234 (after a moment’s hesitation) :“No – but I used to be an altar boy!” Tom Grovervia e-mail

We were approaching ORD from the east years ago in a B-727, which was famous for being able to descend very steeply, as long as it was not speed-restricted. ORD approach was changing from an east landing configuration to west, meaning that the airplanes over Lake Michigan were all going to end up high because […]