Short Final

More from our “It’s all about priorities” file … Saturday a.m. — during Round 2 March Madness in Illinois. After too much coffee and two hours of touch & goes I was on base after an extended downwind. Two regional jets were waiting for IFR clearance and for me to get out of their way. […]

Frustrated Controller at LaGuardia on a busy day: “Skyhawk 735 do a one minute 360 for spacing on the final”. Veteran, cool, knowledgeable pilot “A standard rate-turn 360 degrees takes two minutes” Controller: “Do a 180 and back ‘er in”.

More from our If Only file… The comm radio failed again while practicing instrument approaches. After restoring communications… Cessna 12345: “Approach, Cessna 12345 is going to break off the approach, procede VFR to (uncontrolled home field), and kick this radio down the stairwell.” Controller, “Cessna 12345, approved, squawk VFR. After a short pause, “Will that […]

Early in my tailwheel instruction, my instructor was trying to teach me wheel landings in a Citabria during a Southern California full-blown Santa Ana. Winds were approximately 45 degrees to the runway, blowing 20 knots, gusting to 35+ knots. After about 20 attempts, with about 20 saves from my instructor (lots of crow-hopping, bounces, you […]

More from our “It’s all relative file” … Approach Control: Cessna 123N, say flight conditions. Cessna 123N: I’m not sure … it’s so hazy up here it’s hard to tell.

A pilot was sitting in his seat and pulled out a .38 revolver. He placed it on top of the instrument panel, then asked the navigator, “Do you know what I use this for?” The nav replied timidly, “No, what’s it for?” The pilot responded, “I use this on navigators who get me lost!” The […]

More from our When you gotta go, you gotta go file… While waiting on the ground for a half hour for bad weather to clear, I overheard the following: Tower: “United 123 taxi into position and hold.” United 123: “We are unable to. We have a passenger in the lavatory.” Tower: “United 124, do you […]

Last week’s short final made me think of our local GA airport, which features the following sign in the men’s room: “Pilots with a short pitot tube and low manifold pressure are advised to taxi up close…” Contributions to Short Final are welcomed at sf@avweb.com.

In the late 80’s, I attended Daniel Webster College for my Aviation Management/Flight Operations Degree. At the time there were several AF ROTC candidates on campus and the usual amount of paraphernalia that accompanies their recruitment. While visiting a friend, an ROTC candidate, in his on-campus townhouse, I had to use his “facilities.” To my […]

Sometimes when we are stressed we forget to think before we key the mike. This actually happened after the oil line blew. N1234: Manchester (N.H.) tower Cherokee 1234 is five miles northwest with a total engine failure. MHT (Using that standard FAA terminology): What are your intentions? N1234: I intend to land! MHT (With that […]