Short Final

While on final, RNAV 9, into Isla Grande airport in San Juan, Puerto Rico recently: Tower:“Mooney 5 Triple 8 Quebec, be advised: Iguana crossing the runway, south to north, midfield.” Then, on short final: Tower:“Double 8 Quebec, iguana no factor. He’s crossed the white line on the north side.” I’ve heard a lot of funny […]

Memphis Center:“Cessna 1234, the HOG MOA is hot. Recommend course or elevation change to remain clear.” Cessna 1234:“How many planes are in there? Usually if there’s only a couple, I’ll go on through.” Memphis Center:“Well, even if there’s only one, you’re supposed to remain clear. But we’ve got four A-10s with transponders off, and I […]

While on a flight from NC to Cape May, NJ (along the coast of MD), I heard this exchange between Dover approach and a pilot: Cessna 1234:“Dover approach, we would like to fly down the coast at 3,000 feet.” Dover Approach:“Cessna 1234, proceed as requested.” A few minutes later … Cessna 1234 (frantic!) :“Dover approach! […]

Overheard on the ground while taxiing with a lot of training traffic around the pattern: C1234P (a very young-sounding female voice) :“Fullerton Tower, Cessna 1234P is at FBO with Whiskey; request taxi to Runway 24.” Tower:“Uh, are you old enough to have Whiskey?” John Duinovia e-mail

Heard in Cape Town, South Africa: N1234A (someone with an American Accent) :“Cape Town, uh – is that going to be the ILS Yankee or Zulu for Runway 19?” Someone Else (not a controller, but someone with a South African accent) :“It must be the ILS Zulu. Yankees are in America, but Zulus live here […]

Mobile (AL) Approach:“Aircraft calling Mobile, say again.” Delta Flight:“Delta 1234, out of 14 for ten.” Mobile:“… That’s a real bad radio; sounds like an old T-37 in my ear.” Delta:“Roger that.” [brief pause] Delta:“How’s this one?” Mobile:“Better. Still a lot of whining in the background.” Delta:“That’s just the flight attendants.” Dan Lukevia e-mail

I was flying with my friend Mike in a 200 King Air inbound to TPA. When we couldn’t get three gear lights, we told the tower we would abort to work on the gear problem. Tower:“Would you like to declare an emergency?” Mike:“Emergency is such a harsh word.” Tower:“Understand. We’ll roll out the equipment anyway, […]

Years ago, I flew out of Santa Monica (SMO). Primary students quickly learned the controllers were sticklers, especially regarding radio communication. And that’s understandable given the high volume of traffic. Early on a Saturday morning, I was holding short, awaiting clearance and monitoring the tower frequency. A student (I checked later) from an area airport […]

Overheard in IFR Magazine‘s “On the Air” I’m a First Officer for TMC Airlines, a small freight airline operating Lockheed Electras based at Willow Run Airport in Detroit, Michigan. We use the call sign Willow Run Three Forty-Six, and we’d just picked up a load of freight at Muskegon, Michigan and were en route to […]

Overheard in IFR Magazine‘s “On the Air” Heard while on approach to John Wayne Airport in Southern California: Tower (addressing a Boeing 737 holding short of the runway) :“Airline One Twenty-Three, are you ready to go?” Airliner:“Well, the captain is asleep – but he should wake up soon.” Gordon B. Craryvia e-mail