Short Final

Gemini Sparkle

Key Takeaways:

  • An airline flight crew received a highly confusing and frequently corrected air traffic control clearance from Roanoke Approach.
  • The captain humorously read back the controller's entire garbled transmission verbatim, including all the corrections and hesitations.
  • Despite the sarcastic readback of the confused instructions, the controller simply acknowledged with "Roger."
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This occurred on a flight from Cincinnati to Roanoke, Virginia around 2005, give or take a couple years; I’m too lazy to look up the actual date in my logbook but remember that flight distinctly. I was the pilot monitoring, and John, the captain, was the pilot flying. We were approaching from the west, heading east, towards the ROA VOR. We were handed off to Roanoke Approach and, on initial contact, heard this:

Approach:
“Airliner 123, cross 3-0 —
No, make that 2-0 miles to the east —
No, make that to the west of ROA at 1-1 —
No, make that 1-0 thousand and 2-5-0 knots —
No, make that 2-0-0 knots.”

I looked at John and managed:
“Huh?”

John smiled and said:
“I’ve got this one.”

He pushed the transmit switch and, with his Minnesota accent, proceeded to read back:
“Airliner 123. Understand: ‘Cross 3-0 —
No, make that 2-0 miles to the east —
No, make that to the west of ROA at 1-1 —
No, make that 1-0 thousand and 2-5-0 —
No, make that 2-0-0 knots.'”

I was laughing so hard I had tears running down my cheeks but I think I heard Approach manage:
“Roger.”


Darren Burger

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